Family Dynamics
by Logie Wan Kenobi
Summary: Logan say's it's because Kendall acts too much like a father. James says it's because Logan acts like a mother hen. Kendall say's it's because James is always babying. Whatever the case, Carlos likes to think of them as foster parents. Head canon based around Kendall/Logan/James pairing and Carlos seeing them as parents in a way. Drabbles.
1. Family Dynamics

**Author's Notes: Okay, usually I don't do author notes and if I would do them, I'd put them at the end. I just wanted to put this first. This is based off head canon that I developed with my cousin while messing around one day. Since then it has grown and turned into a whole different thing. I will be posting small drabbles for this head canon between fics. I haven't put something up in a while and wanted to start this small series which I've wanted to do for a while. This is actually how I came up with Contest For A Heart. I will be updating that story here in the coming weeks. I'm just stuck on a scene that I didn't plan and trying to get it out of the way so I can finally update it. Anyways, I don't want to get flamed for this or anything. It's just simple fun head canon and it will be a little crack-y at times. If you don't like the pairing of Kendall/Logan/James and Carlos as their son (not really) or the family dynamic, please don't waste your time then waste my time by flaming me about it. This is mostly for my enjoyment. Sorry if that sounds bitchy. Anyways, the first drabble:**

They don't know how it started. It just…did. Logan say's it's because Kendall acts too much like a father. James says it's because Logan acts like a mother hen. Kendall say's it's because James is always babying.

Whose ever fault it is, it's still a problem.

Carlos sees the three of them as his parents.

Not like his birth parents, because he's not that stupid. He's actually quite intelligent despite what people think. He just sees the guys as parents for how they act. It wasn't really obvious until they moved to LA and spend every waking hour together.

He'd go to Kendall for guidance. He'd see James for fun times. He'd go to Logan when he had a problem.

Kendall is okay with being the dad. He always wanted to be a role model and if that means he gets to be one for one of his best friends, he's up for it.

And James thinks it's cute how Carlos considers him his fun mommy and made him a card on mother's day.

Logan is the only one with the issue. Mama is not his name and he is by god not a stern and strict, over bearing mother.

Even if Kendall and James say he is.

And the fact that Kendall, James, and Logan are in a committed relationship together hasn't really helped things.

They don't know if it was because he felt left out or that he honestly felt like their child. And it makes sense.

Carlos is still so innocent. Yeah, he's immature and perverted at times, but he is still innocent enough that they don't have the heart to tell him that he doesn't need to go to them for permission or when he has nightmares.

Once he called Mama Knight grandma and Kendall was pretty sure his mother was going to have a heart attack. But she just smiled and waved it off. The blonde is pretty sure that she too is convinced that Carlos is somehow his son. And if she's okay with it, so is he.

Katie is even okay with it. She sees Carlos as a brother. She sees all the guys as her brothers, but Carlos is somewhat more special. Since he started the whole thing she's been on board with it, which scares the other three because she is still getting used to the whole 'Kendall is sleeping with two of his best friends and they're in a committed relationship together and oh my god if she hears anything in the middle of the night she's going to castrate them all'.

Carlos isn't stupid. He knows full well what he's doing. He knows that real families aren't like that. That he's the same age as his friends. That James and Logan wouldn't be able to give birth to him (though Kendall is convinced that James is his blood mother and Logan is the step mother that makes him eat his vegetables).

What really makes it worth it is before bed. James, Kendall, and Logan all head to one room and Carlos heads to his and before he goes in he smiles at them and says 'Night, dad. Night, mom. Night, mama.' As much as the other three don't understand or know what to do, it feels their hearts with joy.

And no matter how many times he almost walks in on them having sex or finds that one spring in his mattress that creaks when he hits it and then continuously hits it because he can't get to sleep and it keeps everyone awake, they will love Carlos and let him do what he wants and think what he wants because who are they to take that away from him?


	2. Animal Noises

Carlos likes it when Kendall makes animal noises. He can sit for hours just listening to Kendall make the noises over and over again. It mostly has to deal with the fact that Carlos wasn't allowed to have a pet growing up because he had so many siblings and his parents didn't think him responsible enough.

And with Kendall he can get any animal he wants.

"DO A KITTY CAT!"

Kendall still has his eyes on the tv, watching the high lights from the hockey game of the night before, "Merow!"

Carlos claps his hands together at the perfection of the imitation, "Okay, okay! Donkey!"

At this one Kendall gives him a look before turning his eyes back to the tv, "He-haw!"

It's been about twenty minutes of this and the blonde is pretty sure that Carlos is actually wheezing he's laughing so hard. It's weird.

"Okay, okay! A doggie! Do a dog!"

Kendall is tired of making noises.

"Woof…"

"…that's not right…"

"…arf…"

"Now you're just messing around…"

"Ruff!"

Carlos playfully shoves him, "Do it right!" He sounds close to whining and Kendall can't help but grin, "Fine, want to hear a Chihuahua?" Carlos nods eagerly.

"Punt…AROU!"

Carlos face fell, "…that's mean! You picked the puppy!"

Kendall bursts out laughing for the first time in twenty minutes, "Okay, okay, I'm sorry! ARU!" He howls loudly, knowing that in the next room Logan is probably trying to do homework and will probably run out to see what's going on and James is still in the bathroom and will yell at everyone to keep it down as he finishes gussying himself up in the mirror.

Carlos grins, "That's better! Now…do a llama!"

"What? No, I'm not going do a llama!"

"But…I want to hear a llama…"

"No."

"But dad…"

"No llamas."

"But…but…but…"

"Oh for the love of…fine!"


	3. Uptown Girl

**Author's Note: The closet featured in this piece is based on how big mine is. It's pretty big and can fit the vanity that I picture that is used. Keep that in mind. It's not one of the dingy small ass closets, but it isn't a full walk in closet.**

"Logan? Logie? Mama are you in here?'

Logan nearly jumps out of his skin when he hears Carlos walk into the room. He has to be careful not to knock anything over or make too much noise so the smaller boy doesn't know he's in the closet.

He does his best to hide everything in is respectful place in the closet, closes the vanity and pushed it behind the few boxes that he has still not unpacked from when they moved into The Palm Woods. He quickly wipes his face off on his sleeves, knowing that he might have been better to grab one of the shirts hanging up above him.

"Mama?"

Logan stiffens as he hears Carlos close to the closet. He holds his breath, hoping he doesn't find him and ask him why he's hiding in his closet.

He waits a few minutes before he hears the Latino sigh and leave the room, closing the door behind him. Logan sighs as he walks out of the closet and looks around. He is glad not to see anything is missing or out of place. Then he wonders what Carlos was looking for him for. He wipes his face on his sleeves again before he walks out.

He finds Carlos at the kitchen island talking to Katie.

"Hey Carlos."

Carlos looks up and gives him a surprised look, "Dude! Where were you?" Logan shrugs and leaves it at that as he goes to the refrigerator to get something to drink. He walks back over with a bottle of water and notices Katie. Staring. At. Him.

"…what?"

"…are you wearing make-up?"

Logan freezes. He was certain that he had wiped it all off his face.

"H-huh? What are you talking about?"

"Dude! She's right! Are you wearing lip stick?"

Logan is pretty sure his face is red now and his manliness has dropped. A lot.

"Wh-what? Why would I be-?"

"Whoa!"

They all three turn to see Kendall walking out of his, Logan, and James's room with a wig in his hand, "Who owns a wig?" Katie and Carlos turned to Logan, looks expectant.

"What are you looking at me for!?"

Kendall looked at them and raised an eyebrow, "…and what's going on out here?"

"Mama's wearing lip stick!",Carlos snickered a bit.

"And I think that's mascara too!",Katie added, pointing at Logan's face. Logan is trying to will his heart to stop beating or for head to explode or for some force of nature to eat him and take him away from the embarrassment.

He doesn't move as Kendall walks over and gets in his face. Logan wants to look anywhere else but he can't, Kendall's green eyes keep him in place.

"…you're wearing make-up…"

The genius keeps quiet. If he doesn't say anything maybe they'll stop.

He watches as Kendall looks at him then at the wig in his hand and back.

"Do you know why this was in the closet?"

Logan keeps quiet.

"And why I found some dresses in those boxes?"

His eyes widen. He was pretty sure he had put the boxes with the dresses in the very back, away from everyone. He gulps and he knows Katie and Carlos was hanging on to every word, watching with interest.

"…no…", it comes out as a squeak and he knows that they all know he knows exactly what's going on.

A grin spreads across Kendall's lips and he puts the wig on Logan who pouts, not liking where this was going.

"Oh, wait till James hears about this."

And when James finds out he and Kendall go shopping, dragging Logan to any shop they deem worthy enough. Buy make-up, dresses, skirts, blouses, and heels. Bras and thongs, silk panties and bustiers. Things are packaged in bags with tissue paper or boxes with ribbons and bows. Logan doesn't know how it gets that bad. But he doesn't complain when he gets to bring the vanity in his closet out and have it out in the open where he can use whenever he wants.

Not like having Carlos call him 'Mama' in public was bad enough already. Now he wears these things when the other two make him and Carlos goes all out on the 'Mama' thing and Logan doesn't know if he should embrace it or stab someone with a heel.


	4. Underneath Antics

So the guys all plan to have a night out. Kendall, James, and Logan hadn't had a date night in awhile and they all hadn't just had a night to themselves. So, they got dressed up and went out.

Of course it was the four of them, they knew Carlos would feel left out if they went to relax at a nice place without them, not that they would leave him alone anyways.

So, they went to a nice restaurant James had been wanting to go to since they had arrived in LA. They got a table near the back, away from anyone who might recognize them and harass them as they ate.

Dinner went on as it usually would: four friends having fun hanging out, considering three of them were going out and the fourth was like their child. But it didn't matter. They were eating and having fun and enjoying each others company, something they hadn't gotten to do for awhile. It was nice. Made them seem like they were back in minnesota.

Of course it couldn't last the whole night.

"I have to pee.",Carlos announced, not loud enough for everyone around to hear them, but enough to cause Logan to sigh.

"Then go.",the genuis shook his head. He often worried about the things Carlos did and said.

Carlos gave a small whine, causing Kendall to frown, automatically becoming worried and James gave him a sympathetic look. It was easy to tell how each one treated him.

"I don't know where it is..."

Logan groaned, he knew where this was going. Naturally he would be the one to take him. He almost always was. he was the one who accompanied him to the doctor or dentist or, to say, find a restroom. James was the one that went and took him to get clothes, hit on girls, or things like that. Kendall also took him to hit on girls, he and James always argued about how to do it, buthe also did things like take him to the hockey rink, video game stores and things like that.

In short, Logan had the short stick.

"...fine...",the brunette got up and rolled his eyes when the Latino gave a huge grin. The two walked off in search of the bathroom, leaving James and Kendall alone.

Kendall turned to James, opening his mouth to ask James 'so, what do you want to talk about?' but he didn't get to as James suddenly slipped under the table. The blond furrowed his eyebrows, "James what are you-?" He stopped,froze.

Were those? Yeap, those were hands. And they were undoing his pants. And oh!

Oooooh.

Kendall bit his lip as fingers wrapped around him and he heard a muffled chucke. He let his eyes dance around the restrautant to see if anyone had noticed.

No one seemed to have, so that was good. Or, it should've been. He wasn't sure at the moment as he felt a mouth around his dick.

Letting out a small 'fuck',he griped the table cloth. In the back of his mind he was convinced that James had tried to use Carlos to lure Logan away so that he could have Kendall all to himself for awhile. But he knew James wouldn't think about that and Carlos would be upset that Logan wouldn't be allowed to join in and then maybe make a statement about how much he wanted to join in.

He groaned a bit and put his face in his hands. James was an ass, working slow, teasing him, all tongue at the moment. James knew how to use his mouth and tongue, almost an expert.

"Hey, where's Mommy?"

Kendall almost jumped when he heard Carlos and quickly looks to see Carlos and Logan sit back down. Kendall of course tries to think of what to say to explain.

"He's outside."

It's such a quick response that Carlos groans and Logan raises an eyebrow. Carlos believes it and is disappointed but Logan is smart. It only takes a small flinch when James sucked on him and Logan knew.

His eyebrows raised and brown eyes widened in understand, letting out an even "Oh."

Carlos frowned, confused, 'Oh? Oh what? Is it about James?"

Logan nodded then shook his head, confirming then disappointed, 'Yes, it is." He turned to the Latino and Kendall was afraid of what he was going to say. How did you just say 'Mommy's under the table giving Daddy a blow job'?

"Carlos, there's something we have to tell you..."

Kendall knows James was thinking it entertaining from the way he sucked more, licking, teasing, being a fucking cock clut and Kendall put his face in his hands, biting his lip.

"Mommy smokes."

Kendall peeked through his fingers. What? He watched as Carlos made a face, taking in what Logan had told him. Logan had a sort of pissed off look on his face, like he had been defied. It would've been cute if Kendall wasn't trying so hard to keep quiet, which was becoming harder to do. He had let small groans and pants out, but no one was paying them any mind and Logan was more occupied with telling Carlos some lie and Carlos was too absorded in the lie.

James was going full out now, causing Kendall to shake a bit, wanting it to end, to get it over with not have to worry about James and getting caught.

"But that's really bad for him!",Carlos whined, devastated by Logan's lie that James was 'smoking'. Logan just nodded, obviously using this as punishment against James and Kendall, "I know. You should talk to him about it when he comes back."

"YOu think he's still outside? I should go talk to him..."

Kendall quickly nodded, "Yeah. You should." He gave a small gasp, holding back wiht all his will power not to moan out as James used his tongue just right.

Logan gave a glare. He hated when James did these like that, knowing that he was showing off and gloating, showing what he could do and how brave he was. And had purposefully waited till Logan was gone to do it.

Kendall knew when they got back home it would end up with Logan yelling at James and Kendall trying to calm them down and it would end in sex. Most likely James and Logan fighting for who got to top the other and Kendall just topping whoever was the top out of it.

Carlos nodded and got up, "I'll be right back." The Latino jumped up and walked out of the restaurnt.

When he was gone Kendall put his head on the table and gave a low groan, like he had heard news he didn't wnat to hear. Logan rolled his eyes, "James...the hell ar eyou thinking!?" He hissed, glaring at the table, as if he could see the tall brunette underneath. He tensed when he felt the other boys hand on his leg but quickly got in control and pushed his hand off of him.

"Come on...hurry up...dammit..",Kendall rolled his hips a bit, not wanting to draw attention to himself.

James seemed to agree and worked harder, using both mouth and hand.

Logan did his best to ignore it,shaking his head. Kendall understood why he was so mad, they all fought over each other, it wasn't uncommon, but Logan seemed to always feel inferior when it came to sex. He wasn't as good as the other two, hadn't had as much, say, practive as them. Where as the two had had sex with other people before they started their relationship Logan only had sex with Camille.

Kendall was certain that's how he had developed all his kinks: cross dressing, bdsm, bondage, everything. He had most of the kinks, James had the skills, and Kendall had the possessive personality. Of course, not at the moment.

His thought was interrupted when the only thing on his mind was the rapid flow of pleasure going over his body, sending his nerves on fire and buck his hips once, xoming hard in James' mouth.

He panted into the table not having to look up to knwo Logan was watching him, the anger gone with a look of wonder. He always had that look when him or James orgasmed, like it was the most magnificent thing ever.

He knew James had swallowed all of it, licking Kendall's now limp dick before pulling away and licking his lips.

Kendall had to force himselg to remember to put him back in his pants, knowing that as soon as James popped out from under the table and Carlos showed back up.

James came out from under the table and Logan and Kendall were surprised that no one had noticed it. It was like he was a ninja. A sex ninja.

James had a smug look, "You look mad, Logie! Do you want one?" He fluttered his eyelashes and watched as Logan glared at him. The smaller brunette got up, "I'm going to get Carlos..." With tha he turned on his heel and walked off.

James chuckled, "Did I do something wrong?" His eyes watched Logan walk off before he looke at Kendall. The blond couldn't help but smirk and shake his head, "Just...caught me off guard is all...and you know how Logan is with Carlos knowing..." Which was weird because Carlos knew they were all having sex, but Logan liked to think he didn't, or rather, didn't know what it was.

Kendall knew it wouldn't be long until Carlos was part of their fucked up situation. James nodded, "I know..."

James was the one that was looking forward to that day more so then Kendall was. He knew James was the one that wanted to be the one to take the Latino and Kendall was okay with it.

Logan on the other hand..

"Maybe I should just give Logan a blowjob in the limo."

"No James."

"But-"

"Wait till we get home..."

The brunette sighed and nodded, "Okay..."


End file.
